When we were talking during breakfast on Saturday, you said something that really hurt me. As we were talking politics, you made a comment on homosexuals saying, "If they want to practice their lifestyle, whatever, but I would never be friends with one of them." Taken aback, I asked, "One of who?" "Homosexuals." You replied. You then went on to say that it is important to stay away from the kinds of people that will bring us down, that don't hold good moral standards.
Perhaps one day, Dad, I'll be able to tell you that I'm a 'homosexual'. It hurt to see you shut out a whole group of people (which includes 'good' and 'bad' individuals, as any group does) based on one characteristic. I've heard you call Rosie O'Donnell a "scumbag" and a "maggot" and I know you can't even watch anything referencing gays on the news. But what if I come to you one day and let you know that this is something that I deal with as well? Will you turn away from me because I will bring you down morally? Will you shut me out because I'm different? Will you still love me?
I pray God you will, because Dad, I love you so much and always will. No matter what.
your son
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
beau sourire
I just want to thank the beautiful girl with Down's syndrome that I saw today. Her radiant smile made my day.
:)
:)
Friday, March 21, 2008
Gandhi's Seven Deadly Sins
Mohandas Karamachand Gandhi, one of the most influential figures in modern social and political activism, considered these traits to be the most spiritually perilous to humanity:
Wealth without Work
Pleasure without Conscience
Science without Humanity
Knowledge without Character
Politics without Principle
Commerce without Morality
Worship without Sacrifice
Pleasure without Conscience
Science without Humanity
Knowledge without Character
Politics without Principle
Commerce without Morality
Worship without Sacrifice
taken from this site:
Thursday, March 20, 2008
activism
Over the past month I have had contrasting moments where I realize how blessed I am and how good my life is, and how horrible and awful life is for many other people in this world. Granted, I have hard days and sometimes I think my life is so difficult and terrible. My life is the only one I have lived or will ever live, so I know the most about it. However, I would take my trials, challenges, doubts, questions, and hardships over those of anyone else. I've had recent experiences where I've had a window into the lives of others, and it has given me a much stronger desire to DO SOMETHING to help those who need it.
A couple weeks ago, I started watching Schindler's List. 
That film affects me so strongly, and even after watching half of it I came away with renewed amazement of what we sometimes do to our fellow human beings. Anything I see or read about the Holocaust amazes and terrifies me. During the movie I looked at the Germans who truly believed what they were doing was okay. Perhaps some of them questioned what they were doing. Perhaps when they went home to their families that night remembering the killings they had aided in that day. 
Then I looked at the Jews and thought of the emotional cost of seeing your husband or wife shot right next to you. Of seeing your grandfather led away to be killed because he's "worthless." After watching it I thought, "That was roughly 70 years ago. Only 70 years ago. My parents were alive when that happened. But what is going on in our world right now?" It's not hard to then think of places like Darfur, Burma, Rwanda, and others that have witnessed terrible crimes against humanity. I also think of my own ancestors who were raped, murdered, and forced out of their homes because of their religion. That was in the United States of America, the home of the free and land of the brave.
That film affects me so strongly, and even after watching half of it I came away with renewed amazement of what we sometimes do to our fellow human beings. Anything I see or read about the Holocaust amazes and terrifies me. During the movie I looked at the Germans who truly believed what they were doing was okay. Perhaps some of them questioned what they were doing. Perhaps when they went home to their families that night remembering the killings they had aided in that day. 
Then I looked at the Jews and thought of the emotional cost of seeing your husband or wife shot right next to you. Of seeing your grandfather led away to be killed because he's "worthless." After watching it I thought, "That was roughly 70 years ago. Only 70 years ago. My parents were alive when that happened. But what is going on in our world right now?" It's not hard to then think of places like Darfur, Burma, Rwanda, and others that have witnessed terrible crimes against humanity. I also think of my own ancestors who were raped, murdered, and forced out of their homes because of their religion. That was in the United States of America, the home of the free and land of the brave.I'm also in an abnormal psychology class this semester, and we have been talking about some very difficult and damaging problems in society and in peoples' lives. We've talked about eating disorders
, suicide, and depression. Having had my own struggles with depression, I know what it means to want to harm yourself and even end your own life. I know that so many people around us struggle with similar feelings, and I also know that healing and recovery are possible. I always hope that I would be able to offer help and healing to someone going through a difficult time. Too often the deepest heartaches and sharpest pains go unexpressed.
, suicide, and depression. Having had my own struggles with depression, I know what it means to want to harm yourself and even end your own life. I know that so many people around us struggle with similar feelings, and I also know that healing and recovery are possible. I always hope that I would be able to offer help and healing to someone going through a difficult time. Too often the deepest heartaches and sharpest pains go unexpressed.Last time in my class we talked about substance abuse, and it made me so sad to see how people destroy their bodies, relationships, and quality of life by using drugs and other addictive substances. Not only does it affect those who partake, but also their children,
their partner, parents, and the society they live in. I thought of people I've known and know now that use addictive substances and I worry about them and how that will play out in their future life.
their partner, parents, and the society they live in. I thought of people I've known and know now that use addictive substances and I worry about them and how that will play out in their future life.A couple days ago a friend of mine was telling me about a book he's reading that describes children growing up in a poor, sexually-abusive household and how they were able to finally leave it to make better lives for themselves. 
Then I just think that every day, women and children are abused emotionally, physically, and sexually. Such abuse is a reality for many people, and has far-reaching consequences.
Then I just think that every day, women and children are abused emotionally, physically, and sexually. Such abuse is a reality for many people, and has far-reaching consequences. All of this probably seems obvious. Of course there are terrible things in the world. Most religions attempt to explain why bad things exist and why they happen to us. There are many people who do great good on an individual, national, and international level in helping those who are suffering and caught in dangerous situations. The point of this post is that I have internalized this reality more than I have in the past, and I feel like my former complacency will no longer be enough. I want to help people. I want to make a difference "in my Calcutta" as Mother Teresa said. Of course I can't attack all of the evils in the world and change them, but I think it's important that I look for ways in which I can make a difference in my sphere of influence. The career I'm seeking will provide me with many opportunities I'm sure, but I'm sure right now there are things I can do as a student to help and improve the world around me.
I have so many friends who are examples of this to me. They participate in and organize activities that increase awareness and promote understanding of difficult issues and events going on in the world. Up to this point I have simply admired them from the sidelines, perhaps chipping in the extra minute to listen to them explain what they are involved in. But now, I think I might be starting to understand the feeling that motivates them. Sure I can't change the whole world, but I can use my influence when I can for the good of others and I can seek out opportunities to help. It all seems vague right now, and I'm sitting here with a kind of "now what?" feeling.
All I know is that I don't want to settle into semi-ignorant complacency again. I want this to lead to something more proactive and ultimately more meaningful.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
My spiritual journey continues....
This has been a spiritually moving week, culminating in an actually interesting/edifying Sunday. I have been reading the Book of Mormon with one of my close friends lately, to discuss the scriptures openly and ask questions and get opinions on doctrines and specific verses. It's been helpful, but the other night we were both too tired to concentrate/care about what we were reading. So to close off our session I just looked for a red-highlighted scripture to read. I turned to Alma 36:3, which reads:
And now, O my son Helaman, behold, thou art in thy youth, and therefore, I beseech of thee that thou wilt hear my words and learn of me; for I do know that whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions, and shall be lifted up at the last day.
Upon reading this verse I thought, "YEAH! This is what I deeply and truly believe and long for!" It goes right along with my current approach of letting God guide my life and seeking his guidance in figuring out what I should do in my life. It's certain that along the way I will have trials, troubles, and afflictions (since I already have experienced some) and it's so comforting to know that there is someone in whom I can completely trust to support me. The last clause, when I read it, brought me the same lovely feeling of peace that always means, "It will be OK. Don't worry. It will be OK." I know how I would like my life to turn out and there are things I would prefer over others, but as I put my trust in God my Father then I can know that wherever he leads me I can be confident in knowing that I should be there.
So today at church, I was reading in the Joseph Smith manual (because for once I brought it with me) and I found some gems that really struck me. I want to ponder them some more but here they are with my initial thoughts:
1. "When the fact is admitted, that the immediate will of heaven is contained in the Scriptures, are we not bound as rational creatures to live in accordance to all its precepts? Will the mere admission that this is the will of heaven ever benefit us if we do not comply with all its teachings? Do we not offer violence to the Supreme Intelligence of heaven when we admit the truth of its teachings, and do not obey them? Do we not descend below our own knowledge, and the better wisdom which heaven has endowed us with, by such a course of conduct? For these reasons, if we have direct revelations given us from heaven, surely those revelations were never given to be trifled with, without the trifler's incurring displeasure and vengeance upon his own head, if there is any justice in heaven...."
This one, I admit, knocked the wind out of me a bit. I love the boldness that Joseph Smith uses. And I agree with him 100%. IF we really do take the scriptures as being the "immediate will of heaven," THEN it behooves us to live what they teach. I believe the same goes for our own personal revelations and spiritual experiences. If God has given us light, we can then only live with our without that light. There isn't really a way to do both or neither. I'm still working out my 100% belief in the scriptures, though I know they are important and valuable. I have in the past felt peace about them being true, so I am trying to work all of that out now.
2. "Be plain and simple and ask for what you want, just like you would go to a neighbor and say, 'I want to borrow your horse to go to [the] mill.'"
Here Joseph is talking about the manner in which we pray. I love the idea of leaving the rote repetitions behind and the cliched phrases and really just saying what we mean. I was thinking the other day how in contemporary English the thee, thou, thy, thine form and the you, your, yours form have swapped meanings. Apparently thee was originally familiar and you was formal, but as we all know, they have swapped connotations in our current usage. In French we use the familiar tu form and not the formal vous form in contemporary French, so why not in English? I feel much more personal and genuine when I talk to God using you, etc. In the MTC they were so strict about using the thee form, they even passed out a paper explaining that that was the proper way to pray. In a foreign language like French there's no problem, but why must we be so awkward in English?
I also appreciate how in Joseph's example he uses a banal example for the request. It's like saying, "Hey, I'd like to borrow your car to run to the grocery store real quick." God knows us pretty darn well, so all the formality seems highly unnecessary. And I also believe he cares about our daily needs and issues.
3. "Mormonism is truth; and every man who embraces it feels himself at liberty
to embrace every truth: consequently the shackles of superstition, bigotry,
ignorance, and priestcraft, fall at once from his neck, and his eyes are opened to see the truth, and truth greatly prevails over priestcraft....Mormonism is truth, in other words the doctrine of the Latter-Day Saints, is truth. The first and fundamental principle of our holy religion is, that we believe that we have a right to embrace all, and every item of truth, without limitation or without being circumscribed or prohibited by the creeds or superstitious notions of men, or by the dominations of one another, when that truth is clearly demonstrated to our minds, and we have the highest degree of evidence of the same."
And now, O my son Helaman, behold, thou art in thy youth, and therefore, I beseech of thee that thou wilt hear my words and learn of me; for I do know that whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions, and shall be lifted up at the last day.
Upon reading this verse I thought, "YEAH! This is what I deeply and truly believe and long for!" It goes right along with my current approach of letting God guide my life and seeking his guidance in figuring out what I should do in my life. It's certain that along the way I will have trials, troubles, and afflictions (since I already have experienced some) and it's so comforting to know that there is someone in whom I can completely trust to support me. The last clause, when I read it, brought me the same lovely feeling of peace that always means, "It will be OK. Don't worry. It will be OK." I know how I would like my life to turn out and there are things I would prefer over others, but as I put my trust in God my Father then I can know that wherever he leads me I can be confident in knowing that I should be there.
So today at church, I was reading in the Joseph Smith manual (because for once I brought it with me) and I found some gems that really struck me. I want to ponder them some more but here they are with my initial thoughts:
1. "When the fact is admitted, that the immediate will of heaven is contained in the Scriptures, are we not bound as rational creatures to live in accordance to all its precepts? Will the mere admission that this is the will of heaven ever benefit us if we do not comply with all its teachings? Do we not offer violence to the Supreme Intelligence of heaven when we admit the truth of its teachings, and do not obey them? Do we not descend below our own knowledge, and the better wisdom which heaven has endowed us with, by such a course of conduct? For these reasons, if we have direct revelations given us from heaven, surely those revelations were never given to be trifled with, without the trifler's incurring displeasure and vengeance upon his own head, if there is any justice in heaven...."
This one, I admit, knocked the wind out of me a bit. I love the boldness that Joseph Smith uses. And I agree with him 100%. IF we really do take the scriptures as being the "immediate will of heaven," THEN it behooves us to live what they teach. I believe the same goes for our own personal revelations and spiritual experiences. If God has given us light, we can then only live with our without that light. There isn't really a way to do both or neither. I'm still working out my 100% belief in the scriptures, though I know they are important and valuable. I have in the past felt peace about them being true, so I am trying to work all of that out now.
2. "Be plain and simple and ask for what you want, just like you would go to a neighbor and say, 'I want to borrow your horse to go to [the] mill.'"
Here Joseph is talking about the manner in which we pray. I love the idea of leaving the rote repetitions behind and the cliched phrases and really just saying what we mean. I was thinking the other day how in contemporary English the thee, thou, thy, thine form and the you, your, yours form have swapped meanings. Apparently thee was originally familiar and you was formal, but as we all know, they have swapped connotations in our current usage. In French we use the familiar tu form and not the formal vous form in contemporary French, so why not in English? I feel much more personal and genuine when I talk to God using you, etc. In the MTC they were so strict about using the thee form, they even passed out a paper explaining that that was the proper way to pray. In a foreign language like French there's no problem, but why must we be so awkward in English?
I also appreciate how in Joseph's example he uses a banal example for the request. It's like saying, "Hey, I'd like to borrow your car to run to the grocery store real quick." God knows us pretty darn well, so all the formality seems highly unnecessary. And I also believe he cares about our daily needs and issues.
3. "Mormonism is truth; and every man who embraces it feels himself at liberty
to embrace every truth: consequently the shackles of superstition, bigotry,
ignorance, and priestcraft, fall at once from his neck, and his eyes are opened to see the truth, and truth greatly prevails over priestcraft....Mormonism is truth, in other words the doctrine of the Latter-Day Saints, is truth. The first and fundamental principle of our holy religion is, that we believe that we have a right to embrace all, and every item of truth, without limitation or without being circumscribed or prohibited by the creeds or superstitious notions of men, or by the dominations of one another, when that truth is clearly demonstrated to our minds, and we have the highest degree of evidence of the same."
I think this is one of the clearest and most beautiful teachings I've read of Joseph Smith. At least it really resonates with me right now. I love how he defines Mormonism as the search of Truth--everywhere! And I have a suspicion that some of the creeds, superstitions, and limitations to the discovery of truth might be part of "Mormon culture" or the LDS worldview. This reminds me of when I first learned the expansive, far-reaching teachings of Joseph Smith and how it burst my limited, superstitious bubble to other possibilities and realities I had never before thought of. Truth can be found everywhere, and I think it's sad when people limit themselves out of smug self-righteousness or fear of the unknown and don't grapple with difficult ideas and feelings and come out on top with more truth than they had before.
More on all of this later, perhaps. I want to go on a walk before the sun sets since it's a nice evening (although a bit breezy). Happy Sabbath to all!
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
final resting place
My mom called me the other day, and while talking she said, "Guess what?! You are now the proud owner of a grave plot!" My gramma had an unclaimed gravesite next to hers, and so last weekend she and my mom decided to put it in my name. Apparently a lot of the services are paid as well as the vault and things like that. It was kind of a surreal/morbid conversation, and at one point I asked, "Is the tombstone thrown in as part of the deal?"
Death became more real for me when my aunt passed away last Christmas. I had been to many viewings and funerals before, but she was the first person close to me to pass away. I saw her health suddenly decline, and I will never forget the last time I talked with her, on Christmas Day. I sat by her and held her frail, swollen hand and she asked me about school, and I was able to tell her I loved her. The next time I saw her, her body was still warm, but her heart was no longer beating. She had passed out of this life to a better existence. I believe there is life after this life, that death is not the end of us. This belief definitely helped me deal with her passing, and I was actually glad for her, that she was able to leave her sick, tortured body to rejoin her loved ones and live a life free of mortal inhibition.
As for myself, this same belief helps me look at my eventual death more as a part of life. Death itself does not scare me. I do sometimes worry about dying a painful death or a premature death, but ultimately I won't worry about that once I'm dead. I think having a healthy appreciation for our mortality can help our appreciation of each day and the beauty around us.
One day I was walking to church, and I was looking at the sunny sky and the beautiful snow-capped mountains. I thought, "Today is a beautiful day," then "Today is the last day of life for thousands of people," followed by "Today could even be my last day." These thoughts kind of shocked me by their seriousness and morbidity, but it left me with the desire to appreciate that day and not waste any minute of it. We only have the present, and it's our choice to use it or waste it, to enjoy it or loathe it.
That news from my mom has caused me to once again reflect on my own mortality and the meaning of my life. It's somewhat comforting to know that I have a final resting place waiting for me, but really it's more important that I live my life to the fullest. When the time comes that I use that spot, whether in 70 years or 7 years, will I have been a positive change for good? Will I have helped those around me and showed them that I care about them? Will I have taken care of my loved ones? Will I have stood up for what is right and for those who are right? Will my life have been guided by God and his plan for me? I hope the answer to those questions is YES when "my time" comes. God willing.
Je suis l'écureuil!
On the side of my blog page under the picture it has a question (at least it does in the French version and my blogger/email is in French): Qui êtes-vous?
Qui suis-je? Who am I? Like Juno says, "I don't really know what kind of [boy] I am." My life has undergone some major crises/changes in the last few years, and while I have greatly benefitted from those experiences, they have also caused me to question much that I once took for granted or had accepted about myself. However, there are things that I do know about myself. Here are some of them:
1. I am an inherently valuable person. No matter what I do or where I am, I know that I am worth loving (by myself or others) and I know that my worth is unchangeable.
2. God loves and blesses me. I have a strong belief in my creator who is my Father. He has given me everything I have and he continues to help, guide, and bless me. Even when I feel I don't "deserve" it.
3. I owe everything to my parents, and I love and appreciate them very much. I'm an only child, and I consider my immediate family to be my mom and dad, and my gramma who lives next door to us. My aunt, who lived with my gramma, was also close to me but she passed away this past Christmas. More and more I realize how much my parents have given to me and I realize I can never pay them back completely. (The same goes for God and the way he has blessed me.) My parents are good people who have tried, as best they can, to raise me to be a good person. I think we all feel like they have succeeded.
4. I'm gay. About two and a half years ago I "came out" to myself and began a path of self-acceptance and healing that has led me where I am today. I do identify as being gay, but for now I am not living a homosexual lifestyle. I have tons of gay and straight friends, and though I have dated guys, right now I'm trying to learn to be okay as a single person. But I'm definitely attracted to guys, as is evidenced by the fact that I have been somewhat unconsciously checking out just about every guy around me today.
5. I'm Mormon. I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and have done since my birth. My ancestors are among the founders of the Church, and they made great personal sacrifices to help it succeed and grow. It's a fundamental part of who I am, of my world view, and what I believe. Up until recently I have been completely devoted to its teachings and policies, but in the last year I have experienced a change in paradigm such that I am now investigating the Church all over again.
6. I have varied interests. I love French, and have been studying it for over 10 years. I've lived in both Quebec and France and I currently teach intermediate French. I also love psychology, and I have one year left for my bachelor's in psychology. I have personally benefitted from psychotherapy, and I would like to offer the same or similar help to people who need it. Right now I'm looking into counseling psychology and clinical social work as possibilities for graduate study and carreer options. I also love to DANCE! I love hip hop, ballroom, country, salsa, and any other excuse to shake it like there's no tomorrow! Music plays a large role in my life, and my iPod has been one of my closest friends. I listen to all styles of music, it just depends on my mood. I also love art (especially 19th and 20th century), traveling, eating in new/nice restaurants with friends, watching movies, going to cultural events (gallery openings, concerts, local festivals). All of these things make me happy, but most of all I love connecting with people and learning about and from them.
Qui suis-je? Who am I? Like Juno says, "I don't really know what kind of [boy] I am." My life has undergone some major crises/changes in the last few years, and while I have greatly benefitted from those experiences, they have also caused me to question much that I once took for granted or had accepted about myself. However, there are things that I do know about myself. Here are some of them:
1. I am an inherently valuable person. No matter what I do or where I am, I know that I am worth loving (by myself or others) and I know that my worth is unchangeable.
2. God loves and blesses me. I have a strong belief in my creator who is my Father. He has given me everything I have and he continues to help, guide, and bless me. Even when I feel I don't "deserve" it.
3. I owe everything to my parents, and I love and appreciate them very much. I'm an only child, and I consider my immediate family to be my mom and dad, and my gramma who lives next door to us. My aunt, who lived with my gramma, was also close to me but she passed away this past Christmas. More and more I realize how much my parents have given to me and I realize I can never pay them back completely. (The same goes for God and the way he has blessed me.) My parents are good people who have tried, as best they can, to raise me to be a good person. I think we all feel like they have succeeded.
4. I'm gay. About two and a half years ago I "came out" to myself and began a path of self-acceptance and healing that has led me where I am today. I do identify as being gay, but for now I am not living a homosexual lifestyle. I have tons of gay and straight friends, and though I have dated guys, right now I'm trying to learn to be okay as a single person. But I'm definitely attracted to guys, as is evidenced by the fact that I have been somewhat unconsciously checking out just about every guy around me today.
5. I'm Mormon. I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and have done since my birth. My ancestors are among the founders of the Church, and they made great personal sacrifices to help it succeed and grow. It's a fundamental part of who I am, of my world view, and what I believe. Up until recently I have been completely devoted to its teachings and policies, but in the last year I have experienced a change in paradigm such that I am now investigating the Church all over again.
6. I have varied interests. I love French, and have been studying it for over 10 years. I've lived in both Quebec and France and I currently teach intermediate French. I also love psychology, and I have one year left for my bachelor's in psychology. I have personally benefitted from psychotherapy, and I would like to offer the same or similar help to people who need it. Right now I'm looking into counseling psychology and clinical social work as possibilities for graduate study and carreer options. I also love to DANCE! I love hip hop, ballroom, country, salsa, and any other excuse to shake it like there's no tomorrow! Music plays a large role in my life, and my iPod has been one of my closest friends. I listen to all styles of music, it just depends on my mood. I also love art (especially 19th and 20th century), traveling, eating in new/nice restaurants with friends, watching movies, going to cultural events (gallery openings, concerts, local festivals). All of these things make me happy, but most of all I love connecting with people and learning about and from them.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
I'm back....
While sitting in class today I got really bored and I needed something more stimulating to do. After deleting email contacts that I didn't want/need anymore, and after looking up how little money I have, I decided to finally do what I've been considering for a few weeks: make another blog.
I used to have a blog, but I deleted all of it a few months ago, which I feel was beneficial since the purpose of the blog itself had become somewhat nebulous and I felt like it was my "Tom Riddle's diary", as if it was somehow possessing my soul. I also made my first blog as part of a bandwagon of friends who created their own blogs, and though it was supposed to be anonymous it never was because a friend helped me create it!
Today it was different. At least I hope so. I'm still trying to figure out what purpose I want this blog to serve. Will it be a mirror for me to see my thinking in? Will it be a way to show off my life to nameless others? Will it simply be a short fling and then become forgotten? I'm still trying to figure this out, but I figure writing something is a good start.
Mostly, I have felt the need from time to time to write something where I could possible have feedback or at least reread what's on my mind in order to figure things out. It's sometimes bizarre to me that people put their deepest feelings out there where anyone could read them, yet I do see value in sharing personal things to some extent because we are all here to learn from one another and one never knows how one's words might help someone else.
The blog title comes from my all-time favorite movie, Thoroughly Modern Millie. At the end of the movie Millie says the vivacious, go-getting Muzzy is "like a squirrel, storing the nuts of life." To me that represents the living of a full life, being open to new experiences and not being afraid to try new things. Life is a potential harvest of experiences and friends, and I am trying to live my life in that way.
So I as a squirrel am searching for those precious acorns that will broaden my experience and enrich my life. This blog will most likely be a log of the things that touch me, make me laugh, and that buzz around inside my head.
I used to have a blog, but I deleted all of it a few months ago, which I feel was beneficial since the purpose of the blog itself had become somewhat nebulous and I felt like it was my "Tom Riddle's diary", as if it was somehow possessing my soul. I also made my first blog as part of a bandwagon of friends who created their own blogs, and though it was supposed to be anonymous it never was because a friend helped me create it!
Today it was different. At least I hope so. I'm still trying to figure out what purpose I want this blog to serve. Will it be a mirror for me to see my thinking in? Will it be a way to show off my life to nameless others? Will it simply be a short fling and then become forgotten? I'm still trying to figure this out, but I figure writing something is a good start.
Mostly, I have felt the need from time to time to write something where I could possible have feedback or at least reread what's on my mind in order to figure things out. It's sometimes bizarre to me that people put their deepest feelings out there where anyone could read them, yet I do see value in sharing personal things to some extent because we are all here to learn from one another and one never knows how one's words might help someone else.
The blog title comes from my all-time favorite movie, Thoroughly Modern Millie. At the end of the movie Millie says the vivacious, go-getting Muzzy is "like a squirrel, storing the nuts of life." To me that represents the living of a full life, being open to new experiences and not being afraid to try new things. Life is a potential harvest of experiences and friends, and I am trying to live my life in that way.
So I as a squirrel am searching for those precious acorns that will broaden my experience and enrich my life. This blog will most likely be a log of the things that touch me, make me laugh, and that buzz around inside my head.
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