Over the past five years, I have noticed a pattern: about the end of December or beginning of January, I begin feeling apathetic, depressed, irritable, and just not myself. By the end of February or March, I feel cheery and "normal" again. However, it was only last year when I became aware of the pattern, and though I somewhat anticipated it returning again this winter, I was hoping I could stave it off with exercise, sleep, and a healthy diet. Well...not so lucky. I took a look at the most common symptoms of seasonal affective disorder, and I found several that apply (and that recur every year, around this time):
- a change in appetite (somewhat)
- weight gain (i wish)
- a drop in energy level (yep)
- fatigue (yep)
- a tendency to oversleep (somewhat)
- difficulty concentrating (yep)
- irritability and anxiety (yep, much to my chagrin)
- increase sensitivity to social rejection (yep)
- avoidance of social situations and loss of interest in the activities you used to enjoy (yep, it sucks)
I don't really know what the point of my writing this is; I suppose I just want to state that I have this problem, and I need to figure out the best way of going about it. I just don't feel like myself right now, and I feel more frustrated than anything that my brain chemistry gets screwed up at times when I really have so much good in my life. Well, this isn't meant to be a pity party, but if anyone has some Prozac to spare, send it over.
