I didn't intend to write a "part 3." But I have had somewhat of a reawakening these past couple months, which I feel the need to share and process through writing.
One evening in May, I went to an impromptu gathering at the Geller Center for Spiritual Development (which I began attending last fall semester). The guest speaker was a wonderful woman with such a light spirit, and wonderful spiritual knowledge and insights to share. I really felt a connection to her, and to the words she used, because they were the words I had begun using to describe my spiritual experiences and my spiritual awareness. That night, I was reminded of the incredible spiritual experiences I have had throughout my life. I had been feeling somewhat distant from that part of myself for a few months, and that night I felt a rekindled desire to learn to use my spiritual gifts for my good and the good of others.
Throughout my life, I believe certain people have been placed in my life as guides and sources of knowledge who have helped me grow and understand myself and my experiences more fully. My mom is one of them, along with a few other individuals with whom I have felt a powerful, soulful connection. Thankfully, a couple of them currently reside in Fort Collins, and they have been an important part of my current awakening.
This spiritual awakening has been healing, in that it has helped me integrate my spiritual past with my present experience. I believe that Mormonism provided me with a foundation for understanding the spiritual, for calling on the Divine and seeking personal guidance and direction. I had many sacred experiences within the Mormon context, which I continue to cherish and contemplate. I had been taught that if I ever departed from the "straight and narrow path" I would lose that connection to God (the Gift of the Holy Ghost), but my experience has been quite the opposite. Since accepting myself fully for who I am, I have felt an ever increasing connection to spiritual energy, and have continued to be guided, inspired, warned, and protected in amazing ways. As I continue to learn, I gain a greater appreciation for my spiritual heritage, and am thankful for it. This has been so helpful for me, since I no longer feel like I have rejected the religion of my birth, but have taken the best of what it offered me and have moved forward into the path I feel I need to travel.
I see now how I have always lived intuitively, following my feelings or the "vibes" I felt in order to navigate the world. I am currently reading Sonia Choquette's book Trust Your Vibes, which has given me a lot of insights into how to better understand spiritual energy and live a "six-sensory" life. Much of what has happened and is happening to me in the past few months is hard to explain, and sometimes might sound crazy, but I am loving the space I am in right now, and look forward to where I am going. I truly feel that this is a new and wonderful chapter in my spiritual/personal development, and I ultimately feel that my spiritual home is within me, around me, behind me, and in front of me, and that there are thrilling developments to come.
Namaste.
